Leveraging Depression
a counter-intuitive approach to working with the blues
In the following post, I pull from a dialogue I have with a Tibetan Lama who lives in my imagination. I don’t claim that this is channeled information or anything like that. It’s just me putzing around with ideas and having fun. The word “Rinpoche” means precious jewel, and is used in the Tibetan tradition as a title of respect for a teacher of dharma (teachings of liberation from suffering).
Dear Rinpoche,
Please help me. I am suffering due to my addictions and harmful habits, which seem to have overtaken me. I feel so sick. So lousy. Lonely. Sad. Miserable. I just want to cry.
Rinpoche: When depression descends and visits you, uninvited as usual, like a dark, poisonous gas cloud, there is this wonderful possibility available:
“Could I suffer this depression so others may not have to?”
Try asking this, just for shits and giggles:
How can I work with this depression?
How can I work with it as material to build what I want to build which is a life of peace and happiness?
Could I use this depression gas to help others?
Could this sadness and darkness create something that will benefit someone in some way?
You may not have the answers to these questions right away, or at all, but the simple act of even considering them begins to release the pressure valve of the pressure cooker of pain.
Because the trip, as we know, with depression is it’s a very condensed and constricted focus on “me” as an individual who isn’t experiencing things the way “me” would like them to go. Considering others starts to loosen up those chains a bit. It begins to create some breathing room around the bondage.
Maybe you just decide to share a post. Or maybe you write or call a friend who may be going through a tough time. Perhaps you just squeeze out a smile towards someone more miserable than you (of which I guarantee there are many).
Furthermore, the alternative is to have a pity party about your condition. Or sit there beating yourself up for not feeling happy and energized and having your shit together.
You could always shame yourself for doing the things you did, which may have contributed to the release of depression gas. We all know what these things are. Or for not doing the things we should have done to help us feel better, like exercise, a clean diet, meditation, etc.
That is not the preferred option because shame and guilt literally fuel the depression gas machine to keep pumping out clouds in your face.
It’s also great to forgive yourself, love yourself, call on your saviour, guru, angels, etc. Nothing wrong with that, for sure.
But there’s leverage in including others. There’s leverage and power in considering how the pain you experience could be, somehow, a help to others. There is a potential to use the depression gas cloud machine for good.
This article was very timely for me
Your passage about shame fueling “the depression gas machine” felt painfully accurate. It’s wild how easily the mind punishes itself for not feeling better, as if emotional states were moral achievements. That loop can keep a person spinning for years.
Reading this reminded me how self-forgiveness isn’t a spiritual luxury, it’s basic maintenance. It’s the moment you stop arguing with reality long enough to exhale. Depression can’t survive well in that kind of honesty, because it feeds on resistance. Lovely article. 🩵